You don't know me, Facebook.

Sometimes Facebook just freaks me out.  The fact that it seems to tap into whatever I've searched for on line or on Amazon and then bombards me with ads for it.  It's bothersome.  This past weekend I was looking for makeup brushes.  Then the next day I was seeing ads for mymakeupbrushes.com or something.  Today I clicked on a youtube video and the ad was for this make up brushes company.  WHAT THE HELL.

If I type into Google "I purchased make up brushes today" -  will it stop?? 

I spend a lot of time on facebook watching videos from UpWorthy and the website that shows the animal rescues.  However, I gotta be careful with the animal rescue videos.  Cause first it's the animal rescue.  Then it's pet reunions.  Then it's soldier/ pet reunions.  Then it's soldiers coming home surprise reunions.  GAH!!! NOOOOOO.....  The emotions.  I start bawling before Master Sgt. WarHero shows up and the kids start screaming and crying and I'm done.  I'm a mess of tears and snot and it's just not pretty.  So I have to click carefully or I'll end up crying in my e-cig.

The other thing I do on Facebook is take those stupid quizzes.  What is your flower?  What color is your aura?  blah blah blah. 

I don't always like when they tell me what Disney Princess I am because ultimately I get the same Disney princess as one of my friends who I feel is not the same kind of princess as me.  Personally I'd like to take a quiz where all the answers apply to me.  Sometimes I have to pick the closest one, which is sometimes still very far from anything you'd ever find me doing on a Saturday night.  And I am NOT Belle.  Miss "fall in love with the seemingly emotionally unavailable gruff beast...."  shit.  Ok, well the talking furniture would freak me the FUCK OUT. 

I once answered the complete opposite of what I would normally answer and the results still SORT of applied.  So of course, I can only take it so seriously, even though I find it somewhat entertaining.  I thought I would take 4 or 5 quizzes, and take all of the 'Who I am's and see if THAT gives me a better picture of me. 

My most recent round of quizzes tells me that I am Carrie (from Sex and the City), Roller Girl (from Boogie Nights), Elmer Fudd (from Looney Tunes) Donkey (from Shrek) and Jules (from Pulp Fiction).

WTF?

So I am a funny, dense, jackass hunter who can shoot while delivering a kick ass monologue wearing Manolo Blahnik roller skates on my way to write about porn and love in NYC?

Well, ok then.